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Rig Life Christmas Poem

Rig Lynx
  • By Rig Lynx
  • Dec 25, 2020
  • Category : Archives
  • Views : 1114

 

Some they called him weevil, some they called him worm

Some they wouldn't speak to him, figgered he was just short term

They told him "Open up that vee door; go to get the key

It's in the possum belly, in doghouse number three"

 

Took his turns at floor hand, at first a little green

Became the fastest broke out hand the driller ever seen

Morning tour, evening tour, working day and night

Drilled the earth for all she's worth, kept it turnin' to the right

 

The driller called him partner; the pusher called him son

The other roughnecks shook his hand, and took him in as one

Got up on the monkeyboard; learned to spin the chain

Pumped that mud and shed his blood, and worked right through the pain

 

On a bitter frosty evening tour, in a cold December snow

He saw derricks lit like Christmas trees in distance far below

He saw the fairyland of the refinery, shining through the night

He saw Mother Earth and the universe, all turning to the right

 

The oil patch was a hard life, moving all the time

But he saved a lot of money, didn't waste a dime

Morning tour, evening tour, working day and night

Drilled the earth for all she's worth, kept it turnin' to the right

 

Sent his kids to college, working through the years

One became a teacher, the others engineers

He hung up his hardhat; he shed his steel-toed shoes

Then one day he passed away; he'd finally paid his dues

 

Made it to the Pearly Gates; they handed him his wings

Handed 'em right back to them; said "I don't need these things.

I want to do some drilling. That's my heavenly plan."

They said "Go talk to the Devil then, cause he's the company man."

 

Old Scratch needed hellfire; he always come up short

Too many politicians and others of that sort

When he heard they had a driller, he jumped up with delight

He danced a jig, "You've got your rig. Keep it turnin' to the right."

 

Now he drills for hellfire; in the derrick he's got Jake

Buck and Sam on the platform; Sonny's on the brake

They all grin like demons; they're all where they belong

Doing what they love to do, they sing their roughneck song

 

"We all eat caliche and drink the devil's brew

Play dominos with Satan and skunk him at forty-two

Work all day on Sunday and honky-tonk all night

We're oilfield trash and we'll take cash to keep it turnin' to the right

 

We all love West Texas; it's like the Promised Land

Horny toads and rocky roads, and even dunes of sand

Dust storms every morning, northers every night

We get tans and freeze our cans to keep it turnin' to the right"

 

The lingo used around the rig you won't hear much in church

It'll curl your hair and make you stare and leave you in the lurch

So close your eyes and realize it's gonna get much worse

Drink your beers and plug your ears; here comes the final verse

 

"We p*ss longneck Lone Stars; we f*rt Frito pie

Give us ****, and we will spit some Red Man in your eye

Don't **** with us, or we will cuss and bring you to the fight

We're low class, but we kick *** to keep it turning to the right"

 

©Roy Jerden 2012

 

Merry Christmas to our teams all over the world, without you the world would freeze in the winters and burn up in the summers!

 

Thank You

 


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